february yeah, THE dreaded month.

i've only about a week left in dhaka and life here has slowed to a crawl. i've been sitting on my ass for almost a whole two months here. and it's still forcasted that the next few days will be more of the same.

it'll be bittersweet to finally get back to singapore. i wonder if my darling parrots still love/hate me. the weather is still cold. i'm still enjoying every minute of the weather despite freezing my butt off.

a few days ago there was a rumor that there would be no gas or electricity in the gulshan and baridhara area for 48 whole hours. it never happened. thank god.

i've no idea what would await me back in singapore. of course the smiles from my friends and family and the familiarity of bukit batok and the warmth of my bed. but the prospect of the impending doom of my results still hangs thickly in the air and i'm totally not looking forward to it.

the chances that what i expect for my results would be pretty high. but as my dear nadhirah puts it, good or bad, let's just have fun. and yeah, whatever heads my way is not such a bad thing afterall.

there is honestly no shame in it. but it would be good to have some direction in life. and i would definitely welcome the change but, i suspect, with what has happened in the last few rocky (to say the least) years of my life, i would lose interest in it quickly.

focus.
if there's one thing i desperately need, it's focus. and determination. over the years, my quality of achievement has deteriorated. i know for a fact that i am capable of doing whatever it is that i put my mind to. i've done the seemingly impossible (although, it wasn't spectacular i must admit) many times and i'm sure i can do it. i AM smart. i know it. i've seen my past results. they're good. and they still can be.

life, watch out. here i come.
properly.  ¶ 1:06 AM